Balance Is B.S.: What Women in Law Actually Need
Let’s go ahead and say this out loud: The idea of perfect balance? It’s a myth.
For years, women in law have been sold this dream:
You can have it all.
You can “do it all.”
You just need to find the right balance.
And listen—I love a good checklist and color-coded calendar as much as the next powerhouse. But this notion that if we just organize harder or hustle better, we’ll suddenly feel peaceful, present, and perfectly balanced?
It’s B.S.
Balance Isn’t the Goal—Alignment Is
Here’s the truth: You are not one-dimensional. You are a lawyer, a mother, a partner, a friend, a leader… a human being.
So expecting your life to feel perfectly “balanced” every day is setting yourself up for disappointment.
There will be seasons where your career takes more of you. There will be seasons when your family needs more of you. There will be seasons where your well-being needs to come first.
And none of those mean you’re failing.
They mean you’re living.
The Power of Real Time Alignment
Instead of balance, I want to invite you into something more honest—and way more empowering: real time alignment
It’s the idea that your priorities will shift depending on what life is demanding from you right now. And that’s not weakness. That’s wisdom.
Just like the seasons change, so do your energy, your capacity, and your values.
This week, alignment might look like showing up hard at trial and ordering takeout three nights in a row. Next week, it might look like skipping a networking event because your kid has a school play—and you want to be there.
It’s not about “doing it all.” It’s about doing what matters most right now.
Let me tell you about a conversation I had recently with a fellow lawyer—brilliant, experienced, and absolutely done trying to chase balance the way everyone told her to.
She told me:
“I stopped going to CLEs and seminars positioned around "work/life balance." Every time I left one, I felt worse—like I was failing at something everyone else seemed to have figured out. If I just bought one more book, downloaded one more planner, or followed one more ‘this is how I do it’ talk, then maybe I’d feel balanced.”
But after years of chasing that impossible standard, she finally had her moment of clarity:
“I realized what they were teaching wasn’t even possible. At least not for me—not for my life, my family, and everything I’m carrying.”
And that is the moment everything changed for her.
Because she stopped trying to fit into someone else’s version of success—and started creating a version that felt aligned for her.
Alignment isn’t about what’s on the agenda at a seminar.
It’s about knowing yourself well enough to call B.S. when the rules don’t work for your real life.
Permission to Pivot
So let’s just go ahead and release the guilt:
- You are allowed to not be everything to everyone, all at once.
- You are allowed to let something go—even if it’s just for now.
- You are allowed to redefine what balance looks like for you.
This isn’t about lowering the bar. It’s about aligning your life with your values—not someone else’s expectations.
Because when you live in alignment, everything flows differently. You stop hustling for worthiness. You start moving with purpose.
What Alignment Actually Looks Like in Real Life
- It looks like canceling that “should” meeting to prioritize your mental health.
- It looks like redefining success in a season of motherhood.
- It looks like checking in with yourself—not your calendar—to decide how to lead your week.
Alignment isn’t always glamorous. But it is sustainable.
And the more you give yourself permission to pivot, the more you realize… You never needed perfect balance. You just needed the freedom to trust yourself.
P.S. If you’re in a season where something feels off—you’re not alone.
Sometimes we’re too deep in it to see what needs to shift. If you’re craving alignment but not sure where to start, I offer obligation-free connection calls for powerhouse women ready to find their flow again.
On our call, we’ll: ✅ Get clear on what’s not working ✅ Identify where you’re out of alignment ✅ Create a strategy for realignment that works with your life—not against it
You don’t need to balance it all. You just need to start where you are.
Let’s find what feels right—for you. XO, Erin
